Bad Stuff Happens
It’s not something I give a lot of thought. A black and white subject with fundamentalist undertones sometimes delivered with fire and brimstone drama, the notion makes me uncomfortable; far too intense for a conservative nature such clear and marked separations.
I like a world order with plenty of room for love where evil sits in an isolated and desolate back corner far away from me and those I care. The thought of tendrils of malevolent influences filtering through from distant recesses to brush the lives of believers makes me feel uneasy. Sure, bad stuff happens. It doesn’t mean the devil is the orchestra-tor.
But the thought floating around my minds periphery is persistent. I don’t want it to land and stick. I don’t want to look.
Nothing Concrete
At the close of the year I conclude God has shown me what she wants–amid chaos God is present and our strength lies in that relationship and not in perceived self-sufficiency (refer: http://carolinmparadis.com/2017/12/17/blog-uncommon-chaos-the-untruth-of-self-sufficiency/). With the message delivered I expect the New Year to unfurl peaceably; the prior year’s stress to dissipate with the fresh start. But it’s not going that way–uncommon chaos persists (refer: http://carolinmparadis.com/2017/10/22/blog-uncommon-chaos-churning/). And it’s not anything dramatic, just insidious life-events that notch up the stress factor making normal pressures multiply.
A Nor-walk type virus hits my household the day my husband has cataract surgery. While attempting to complete year end financials as the church Treasurer I struggle with the gap created by the bookkeeper’s retirement. The learning curve exacerbates in my new contract job with a shortage of equipment and an unusual filing system, and so forth. Jobs are back-piling and everything is taking longer than it should. It is well past the twelve days of Christmas and my Christmas tree stands yet.
There’s nothing concrete to put a finger on just a thin but steady stream of anxiety that permeates my days. The added stress grinds away. It doesn’t feel right.
Evil Unfurled
I understand the notion of spiritual testing. Before Jesus begins his three year ministry he goes into the desert to spend alone time with God, to listen for direction and discern his calling. As Jesus deliberates evil follows him around poking at vulnerable places, stirring self-doubt and fear, and making a trying situation more difficult.
It’s a riveting story (refer: Mathew 4:1-13) where Satan kicks at a depleted and weakened Jesus.
But Jesus is exceptional. He has a remarkable relationship with God and, of course, he beats the bad guy at his game.
That was long ago in biblical times, not in Canada where I live, and except for pictures I’ve never even seen a desert. Evil presents to Jesus in a remote place, not in a suburb of Toronto, and not within the fabric of an ordinary person’s life. It doesn’t bear to think of such influence nearby.
But how do we get through times of trial if we don’t acknowledge the stumbling blocks however subtle they may be? We will trip and fall.
And while scrabbling to get back up on our feet we miss the satisfied smirk of the one inviting us to despair.
To be continued…
Satan only attacks those with a strong faith – he doesn’t need to attack non believers since he already has them. Every time I took a step forward on my faith journey Satan attacked. Every time!!